Thursday, June 4, 2009

A Service Thing

Driving home this morning after Date Nite I was passed by a BMW SUV with the following emblazoned on its license plate: "ISRVGOD". After concluding that the driver was not questioning the deification of Stevie Ray Vaughn, I wondered how indeed was that person serving God? Tea? Subpoena? Oil change? Or were they on their way to serve God in the usual manner of such folks who like to advertise their faith - either by recruiting the unsaved to their side or by blowing them up? Surely not the latter, not in that sweet new Bavarian grocery-getter. Which brings me to my pointless, over-used query - why does God need servants? Can't he get his own shit, being almighty and everything? If I could swap out the motor in my car with the flash of a thought or wipe out scores of infidels with a flood, I'd do it, and I'd probably be able to get people to come around to my way of thinking too. It's obvious that God is no longer the Old Testament badass he used to be, and is now just a lazy corporate executive who sits on his ass and has minions doing all of his dirty laundry.

Damn, I was supposed to talk about homebrewing this time - instead, I'm going to be struck down by God's vengeful wrath. Except that He'll need one of His lunatics to do it for Him.

2 comments:

  1. Sounds like that particular BMW driver was serving god by using up more than her share of the earth's natural resources...

    But wait, are you absolutely sure that the vanity plate wasn't posing a rhetorical question about the divinity of motor homes?

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  2. Good point, one does need to read those things carefully, doesn't one? However, the foot-tall crucifix with Hobbes kneeling next to it, the IXOYE fish, and the SAVED stickers make me think I got it pegged.

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